Continuing from my last post, apparently I am not dismissed from work. Yet.
These 2 weeks as been an amazing ride, not only at work, in my ARTPEACES too (I am still grinning to myself about it). And so many things.
The whole thing got me to experience what Robin Sharma recently taught, “Be in the world but not of the world. Even when you lost it all today, you still get keep your inner peace.”
I started waking earlier, and had my breakfasts before work. If these was my last weeks, the more I NEED to make it better. Not to impress anyone, but to know that I kept to my responsibilities and didn’t seek an easier way to get things done. I used to eat at the workplace coz I wanted that little more time for my work. Or… I was just eating during working time. I think Boss san was really tolerating of me. :3
I have turned over a new leaf Boss san!!
I started with hearing folks say that eating eggs daily ain’t a good thing. BUT I LOVE KAYA TOAST SET SO MUCH! When I am in Okinawa, I will miss this to a point of pain. Or maybe I can pack Kaya with me. Or set up Shingapo-ru Cafe there, where I am my own main diner.
Practically everyone feel FOR me for the possible dismiss. “BUT you love your job!” They all say. Still, loving my job might not mean that I am good enough. Everyone has their own thinking and at times one’s opinion might not always apply.
We has this little conflict at work where Boss san was making me go through the lessons in a “projected” voice. During a lesson rehearsal, for at least 2 hours, I got stopped every few seconds either over being too fast or still too soft in my reading.
It seriously felt like bullying but I thought it is worth a try. After all teachers tends to “project” their voices and all those.
Until… in the classroom, kids are literally covering their ears and telling me that I am too loud and that now they can’t hear me (echo and all those).
Teacher Bee and Boss san herself are those ladies blessed with that sweet feminine voice. Even if they are booming their voices, it still sounds nice. While I on the other hand will end up with a very solid voice if I speak out loud.
I myself have very sensitive hearing so I totally get it to not be too loud about one’s voice. At times I am dying in the classroom when my teachers start speaking too loud.
The good thing with a small working environment is, we can always share this kind of things around. But it also get very dangerous if somewhere just one person thinks that their opinion is the absolute.
As I grow older and learning from masters, it occurs to me that it is never my job to go correct someone. Even when a child grips their pencil the incorrect way, there is only so much I can help. And, I was just thinking, in the long run, people tend to develop their own way to maneuver a pencil. Insisting that Teacher Yuxing can only be right doesn’t help anybody.
About stuff I deem as conflicts, I still feel angry and unjust in my mind, but strangely I don’t dwell in them as much. Talked about it with friends and family and that was it. And yeah, writing them now in this blog. I was even trying to keep an open mind about them, could it be me who is resisting good change??
SO. PROUD. OF. MYSELF. I am made.
Everything we chase after eventually comes to an end, but by no mean don’t strive and sink into depression. Focus on what SHOULD be DONE NOW.
Now, about how I became a fairy.
We have this little boy who brings his stuff toy dog to class every time. He managed to pass Doggy to his Dad the first time and soon, we just acknowledge his pet and get on with class.
While passing through the mall to go home last week, I saw him wandering around the shops. I was happy to see him and thought of just walking by but somehow I called out to him.
He was happy to see me and immediately came over. Do you guys know those moments? You can literally see someone’s eyes widen and shine when they see you?? I thought I will now have to say Hi to his parents.
But after looking around for a bit, I don’t see his parents. We walked further into the main path and only then we saw the Dad a bit further down.
I think it is really tough on his parents, since he is such an active boy.
Of coz Dad was rushing and probably a little shy about letting the teacher saw that he had to use the “I am leaving you behind” technic to get his boy to go home together.
And the strangest thing happened. Upon seeing his Dad, this boy was very relieved, yet he started sticking to me and at one point hugged my leg.
Dad managed to get him on his way after saying Bye. The Dad also joked that ok, he is leaving him with teacher and going home himself.
We were on a long stretch of an escalator later on.
I delibrately walked behind to not disturb them and there that angel of a boy was looking at me all the time from several steps up. I had to pretend to look at my phone.
FOLKS, I KID YOU NOT. HE LOOKED AT ME THE WHOLE TIME LIKE HE SAW AN ANGEL FAIRY AND WAS JUST IN BLISS AND AWE.
I don’t know what to feel except to feel so undeserving and all those. DEAR GOD, WHAT GOODNESS HAVE I DONE TO GET SUCH AN EXALTATION?? Thinking back now maybe it was my guardian angles he saw, not really me.
And now, TERM TEST!!
I notice that kids would at times get discouraged if we give them B instead of A. I told them about Thomas Edison. He tried 10,000 times. This is only our 2nd test. If I can do it, YOU CAN TOO.
I love Marisa Peer’s saying on we are born with confidence and self love, but we got taught otherwise.
Just look at these green bits.
They look useless and an utter mess right?
But the little girl who gave me this thought so otherwise. It was not to her liking but she gave them to me so I can use them for ready cut paper strips for Origami art. ❤ And trust me it is not that she is just handling me junk, she is utterly amazing and knows how to clean up things and all. Children still remember their true value.
Speaking of which, I told a boy not to write on the table coz I would have to clean it later. THAT ANGEL THEN WENT AROUND USING AN ERASER TO REMOVE EVERY PENCIL MARK ON EVERY TABLE. AND ALSO MAKING SURE TO COLLECT THE ERASER DUST AND THROWING THEM IN THE BIN.
Why I get these amazing love I don’t know. And I ain’t being humble here, I wish I can brag, I can’t. It is really that for some reason the children just keep giving me big slices of their big big love.
Some of them comes to class early and we do our Origami. That is my chocolate peach and Pandan Taiyaki. I read somewhere about the Beatles Effect. That together as a team, the members became better. I am darn glad and greatly humbled that with the folks at work, I find myself working above what I can by only myself.
Goddess colleague passed me her Origami book and it was such magic for the kids and me. I hope that good things happen to her.
Next, I failed my people by not being able to make some sort of twisting folds.
I am now tasked to make the WHOLE burger for them three kids. xD
The younger brother of the twins did this in the middle of the test. I can only imagine his stress. xD The whole time he ran up to me and asked how his brother flare compared to him in front of the class. I wonder why the older brother haven’t disowned him yet. xD
At one point one was sitting on the other’s lap. And I started kidding with them that the right brother must go back to his own set of test paper, older brother cannot take the younger brother’s paper and vice verse. They used to get angry if I call them the wrong names but they are now going along with my half joke and half really genuinely not being able to tell who is who.
Then the older brother asked, “what is the difference between us?” I couldn’t answer and children are just so cute! They don’t see everyone as different-different. Then Goddess colleague said that they are wearing different coloured pants. xD
Lunch was pasta burger!! =D Burger made from pasta.
And meanwhile, KFC has this chicken tenders and nugget dip bucket. IT IS MADE FOR ME.