I posted this at my Mindvalley course private FB group. I thought it is good to share.
Today mark the 2nd time in me life where my Dad walked me to my warded Mum.
The first time was when I was 5. Mum flew through the windscreen of my cousin’s car.
Today she was to have a minor surgery to remove her gall bladder. What pained me was she has to go through this at 72.
I only met my Dad midway/after the surgery. When the staff called to tell us that the surgery is over but needed a while before they can move my Mum to the bed, I just broke down and cried. I had thought something happened. Before the scheduled surgery, there was a last minute re-scan coz apparently they found a lump in the liver. Turned out all ok.
I remembered that in one live call? Or lesson? Students asked Prof Rao about, how can an obviously bad thing have goodness? (And vice versa, do we all expect badness from an obviously good thing?)
The question was from a man who lost a son and another woman who also suffered similar lost. In the end the guy went, his experience had allowed him to relate with the lady (the so called goddness out of his lost) and they later formed a trust fund for children.
I hope my story today can help young people dealing with aging parents. I want to tell you guys that it is ok that we might sink into denial/hiding mode. Like I left my 84 year old Dad to deal with it all until finally I pulled myself together and met him later.
He likes the milk tea I got. What matters is we must never give in to fate and whine. We are all stronger that we think.
And we will feel extreme guilt. And that is ok. Just don’t crush yourself with it. The world still need you to be the superhero you are. What happened was my Dad actually asked why his Coffee Bean (for overseas folks, it is like Starbucks) breakfast so expensive. He is a little lost touched with the current. And I died when I saw my Mum’s clothes in the bag. It is so painful to know that a person taking surgery literally went in all alone.
Also, keep with you a phone charger.
The last thing is really, sometimes Dad are the strongest. I think I will die if I see my wife on a hospital bed and my daughter in tears. I am sure my Dad is a softie like me. God knows how he dealt with these.
Next, dramas and movies, especially the raging Korean dramas lied!!!! BIG TIMES! NO ONE EVER LOOK REMOTELY OK OUT OF THE SURGEY ROOM. I cried so bad seeing my Mum being pushed to her observation unit the hospital staff were getting ready that I might pass out.
However!!! It is true that juat like in movies, people can just walk in observation rooms easily. All those thrillers and whatnot about rival gang members sneaking in to kill injured mob bosses are REAL. Now we know!!!
And admist all these, I just got notice that I will be leaving my job by August. The good part is Singapore has a very great health care, we need not worry about nedical fees. But in my current reality, I am really worried.
Good thing, bad thing who knows!!!
There is a part 2 ebibody!! 💟💟💟💟💟
And I wish this episode of mine will never have to be repeated elsewhere. May this be a bitter-happy comedy thing. Like damn. I just find myself in a drama setting again I can’t even. 😂😂😂😂